A CLASSIC PUBIC HAIR POEM

 

Not many people know that William Wordsworth's classic poem The Daffodils was originally about pubic hairs. 

 

After much painstaking research, I have unearthed the original poem along with the rejection letter he received from his publishers which went like this:

Here's the original poem:

The Pubic Hairs by William Wordsworth

I wandered, lonely as a cloud

That floats on high o'er vales and hills

When all at once I saw a crowd

Of pubic hairs, it gave me chills

Beside the lake, beneath the trees

Reaching almost to my knees

Continuous as the stars that shine

And twinkle on the milky way

They stretched in never-ending line

The black, the red, the blonde, the gray

Ten thousand saw I at a glance

I very nearly peed my pants

I pondered then and did opine

On whose pubes they might be

For though they looked a lot like mine

They didn't come from me

Then to myself I muttered "Billy,

They clearly came from someone's willy"

And then I thought how most of us

Doth keep our pubes well hidden

For showing them would cause a fuss

And largely is forbidden

And then I wished that I might be

So brave to set my own pubes free

For oft when on my couch I lie

Fully clothed or in the nude

I do regret that even I

Could not attempt to be so lewd

But then my heart forgets its cares

And dances with the pubic hairs